Last Updated on September 8, 2009 by James Dziezynski
I’m not sure if the internal dialogues that transpire in my mind on solo mountain adventures are deep philosophical discourses or nothing more than altitude-inspired ramblings generated by a lack of oxygen and solitude. Have you ever had a dream upon immediate waking seems profound, yet as lucidity fades in with the morning light, the whole thing is reviewed as nothing more than an absurd and disconnected experience?
That’s how it goes with mountain thoughts. After the staple inherent musings that seems to resurface on most hikes/climbs, then comes the stream of consciousness, which is sometimes more like a flood of consciousness. The best thoughts seem to form after an especially focused part of the climb, when any outside interference needs to be temporarily turned off and only the task at hand occupies the mind. Only when the danger is real and the climber entirely in the moment can the denouement allow the outer subconscious to sneak onto center stage.
Like little sparks of inspiration, it becomes easy to visualize a reality with these dreamy components firmly in place — a personality flaw eliminated, a new routine established, an ambitious project begun, a deferred letter finally put into writing. Sometimes the notion sticks, other times it dissolves before getting internalized with enough vigor to be brought to be. For me, clear thinking in the mountains isn’t necessarily the stuff of revelations but is more often the gateway to action. Mountains let me audition thoughts and dreams utterly stifled by the constrained, unremarkable flow of structured life.
And here’s what’s most interesting to me. In the backcountry, my fantasies revolve around the world within my grasp. Books I’d like to write, friends I’d like to know better, places I’d like to visit, changes I’d like to make. In the moment they are exciting and moving. When the equivalent thoughts surface in the midst of the day-to-day grind, they are rooted in pure fiction: the champion baseball player, the astronaut returning from Mars and so on. In many ways, dwelling on these kinds of visions is nothing more than an overloaded mind transporting itself into places so outlandish, they serve merely to balance the bland reality of the previous hours.
Being in the mountains errodes the flimsy highways to pure fantasy and re-routes the creative mind on a much more exciting path. When in the high country, reality is a dreamscape come to life, satisfying the requirements for a suitable backdrop to greather thoughts. It is in the afterglow of adventure that our internal sun nourishes the dark places where our absurd and powerful potential lies dormant. It reminds of Langston Hughes’ Dream Deferred, only with a positive revival of forgotten dreams and destires.
So today’s goal is to sustain– or at least write down–some of those lofty thoughts, regardless of their validity or feasibility. Let’s see how they contrast with the much less exciting daily whims of getting bills paid off or finding a good dentist…
